29 Aug 2013

The Problem with Death: Chapter 10 (Aleena)

I was sat on a small wall beside the records building when the Doctor and Matthew emerged. The Doctor looked older than he had before. His face was tired and lined and he looked drained of energy.

‘Are you alright?’ I instinctively heard myself say.

‘Aleena,’ he said, crossing over to me and sitting down on the wall, ‘I’m sorry.’

I looked at Matthew. He nodded to me and wandered off, hands in his pockets.

‘Why are you sorry?’

‘All of this time…a lot has changed for you, and I should have realised that. And a lot of what has happened to you is my fault.’

I looked at him. I wanted to slap him. I wanted to beat the living dirt out of him. I felt like he was leading me into this. Leading me into making me say it was okay. But that wasn’t the Doctor’s way. That wasn’t what he was like. Maybe past Doctor’s would have been manipulative, but not this one. I was the first person he had seen after he had regenerated. As much as I wanted to hate him, I couldn’t.

Damn him!

‘Say something,’ he said.

A took a deep breath. ‘I’m sorry as well. I’ve had a lot of time to think about you - away from you - and I guess the longer you were away, the more resentment I felt.’

‘I didn’t mean to leave it a year-’

I held up my hand to stop him. ‘I know how temperamental the TARDIS can be. Didn’t you take one of your companions away for 12 months once instead of 12 hours?’

He looked a little uncomfortable at me mentioning that.

‘What I’m trying to say,’ I continued, feeling my resentment towards him start to fade more and more, ‘is that I understand you. I watched you for a hell of a long time. It’s just…a year is nothing to you, but to me, it’s a long, long time. When you didn’t show up after the first month I just let the anger fester inside.’

‘I can understand that,’ he said quietly.

‘When I saw you again, all smiles and chirpy optimism…well, it made me want to punch you in the face.’

He nodded. ‘I can understand that as well.’

‘Maybe I judged you wrongly.’ I grabbed his hand. It was cold and he was trembling slightly. ‘You are my friend and I miss you.’

He smiled weakly. ‘Friends again?’

I nodded. ‘We can always repair bridges. I never burn them anyway.’

‘We need to get a move on, you two,’ came Matthew’s voice from a few metres away.

‘Are you okay?’ I asked.

‘I feel weak,’ he said in an almost whisper-like voice. ‘I don’t know how much longer I can go on.’

‘Then we need to get you and Matthew to our scientists right now.’

‘No,’ he said. ‘I need to sort this Ireel mess out first.’

‘Matthew, come here,’ I called.

Matthew jogged over.

‘Give him a boost.’

‘What?’

‘You did it last time,’ I said. ‘You touched him and he felt better.’

‘What am I, jump leads?’

Matthew cleared his throat, reached out his hands and touched the Doctor on the shoulder. Nothing. We both looked at each other, frowning. Matthew composed himself and tried again. Still nothing.

‘What’s wrong?’

‘I don’t know,’ said Matthew. ‘I didn’t feel anything.’

‘All this is irrelevant,’ said the Doctor, getting to his feet. ‘Even if you did take me to the scientists first they’d not have time to deal with me. They’re too busy with Ireel. Let’s go.’

‘You not well enough.’

‘Aleena, I’m fine,’ he said, wobbling slightly on his feet and then straightening himself up. ‘If the worst comes to the worst I’ll get a walking stick. It’s not like I haven’t used one before.’




We made out way through the streets. The Doctor hadn’t really told us his plan, but Matthew and I both had conferred and agreed that he must have had one. Every time we asked the Doctor just told us we were going to meet someone.

Eventually we reached the council offices. The crystal glass of the building shone down, a beacon of light in the night sky.

We walked through the main doors and into the entrance. There was one, solitary person on the main desk.

‘We’re here to see Mr. Rix,’ said the Doctor.

Matthew and I looked at each other.

‘I’m afraid Mr. Rix is busy.’

‘Then tell us where we can find him?’

‘What’s going on?’ came Rix’s familiar, smarmy voice.

‘Ah,’ said the Doctor, turning to face him. ‘I was wondering if we could have a word.’

‘A word about what? Don’t think you three have been forgotten.’

‘You know who Ireel really is, don’t you?’

‘Yes, she’s out God.’

‘Rubbish,’ said the Doctor. ‘It’s all a lie, isn’t it?’

‘How do you know?’ asked Matthew.

‘That’s just it,’ said the Doctor. ‘I can’t prove it. But Mr. Rix can, can’t you?’

Rix straightened himself up and crossed over to the man at reception. ‘Could you call security please?’

Before the receptionist could do anything, I ran over to the desk, jumped over and held my hand over his mouth. After a little struggling he fell unconscious.

‘Aleena!’ scolded the Doctor. ‘That was uncalled for.’

‘Let’s face it, Doc,’ I said, feeling a little guilty, ‘you weren’t gonna do it.’

‘Take us to your office,’ said the Doctor.

‘And no funny business,’ added Matthew, as he grabbed Rix’s arm and guided him towards the elevators.

‘You will all die for this,’ growled Rix.

‘I can’t wait,’ I chuckled.




A few minutes later we were on the top floor of the building in a large, sparse office. Weird, coloured blob-like paintings adorned the walls and there was a large window looking out over Nazar. A desk sat in front of the window with a number of computer monitors.

‘Now,’ said the Doctor, sitting Rix down on a sofa along the right hand wall, ‘tell us a little about Ireel.’

‘I shall not,’ said Rix, refusing to make eye contact.

‘Come on,’ I said, raising my arm.

The Doctor grabbed me. ‘No more violence, Aleena.’

‘Doctor,’ I said, feeling the anger flare up inside me. ‘He knows something. All the councillors know something.’

‘I know, but threatening him isn’t going to help, is it?’

I was about to answer back when there was what sounded like a huge explosion from somewhere outside. The whole room shook.

‘What was that?’ asked Matthew, quickly running over to the large window.

Myself and the Doctor ran to join him, completely forgetting about Rix.

We stood, staring out across the expanse of the city. Towards the city gates there looked to be a plume of red smoke. And then there came another explosion. And more red smoke.

‘What is that, Rix?’ asked the Doctor. ‘Rix?’

The three of us turned, but Rix was gone.

‘I’ll get him,’ I said, already making my way towards the door.

‘Leave him, Aleena,’ said the Doctor.

‘What? Why?’

‘He’s not going to tell us anything.’ The Doctor cracked his knuckles and then sat down in front of Rix’s computer. ‘And anyway, we have us computer.’

‘What good is that?’

‘We’ll find answers on there.’

‘Why would you he leave stuff lying around that could incriminate him? Surely he’d just remember it?’

‘How good are you at lying?’ he asked.

I was confused at this. ‘What do you mean?’

‘What I mean is that if you tell a lie, the chances are that you won’t always remember what you’ve said. Oh, you’ll remember the basics, but the lie will always change slightly because it’s not the truth.’

‘I get it,’ said Matthew, turning away from the commotion outside. ‘If you wrote the lie down, then you could keep going back to it to check that you’ve got your story straight, yeah?’

‘Exactly,’ said the Doctor, switching the computer on.

‘Not only that,’ I said, realising what the Doctor was saying, ‘but if all the councillors are in on it, then they’d all have to have a copy of the same story.’

The Doctor nodded, smiling. ‘Now, just give me a moment to crack his password, and we’ll get digging.’




PERSENISIUS




There were two women. They had both passed their prime and their husbands had gone looking for new women. This angered the women. They sought out new men, but the men always turned them down for younger girls.

The women grew to hate. They had read about the Regenersis machine. A machine that could regenerate the cells of a body, making a person young again, but that the Regenersis machine had a cost. Such a cost. For every time that the Regenersis machine was activated and used, a person would die. The very life essence, plucked out at random and absorbed into the machine to renew the body of the user.

The Regenersis machine had been banned and locked away. Somewhere.

The two women tracked down a scientist and paid him all of their wealth to help them to find this machine. He did so, gladly, and soon they were in possession of the machine. They retreated to a cavern, deep underground where the machine was installed and activated.

On Xanji-For, a young couple died and the two women were renewed, young and beautiful again. The guilt of what they had done didn’t last long. But the Regenersis machine had a fault. After a few weeks the effects would wear off. They had no choice but to do it again. Except that there would be a problem. If they continued to do this, they would soon be found out by the government.

And so they made a plan.

Xanji-For was war torn. Battles raged outside the city walls and within them. All of the factions fought over religion. People died in their hundreds because of religion. The two women went to the central Government with their plan. They would stop the wars. They would do it by posing as Ireel and Deela, the God and Non-God of Xanji-For. The very people that the wars were fought over.

The Government, on their last legs, agreed.

And so the two women became Ireel and Deela. Ireel appeared before the people and, secretly using the Regenersis machine, proved that their was an afterlife by taking the souls of three mortally wounded soldiers.

The soldiers lay down their arms. Ireel was real. The afterlife was real. And peace fell over Xanji-For.

Ireel and Deela came to an agreement with the Government. They would take the life force of the near-dead or dying in exchange for helping them to seed the lie about the afterlife and thus keeping Xanji-For at peace.

And for centuries the two women continued their everyday lives, changing identity over and over again so as not to be noticed that they never aged whilst secretly living in the caverns far below the surface of Xanji-For.




‘Um, okay,’ I said. ‘I wasn’t expecting that.’

The Doctor switched off the screen and looked solemn.

‘Doctor,’ said Matthew. ‘It’s getting worse out there.’

‘It’s Deela,’ said the Doctor. ‘Or the woman pretending to be Deela.’

‘But why? The lie’s worked to keep us all in line all these centuries.’

‘Because,’ said the Doctor, swivelling around in the chair to look out of the window at the carnage below, ‘all the factions have started appearing again. The one’s who don’t believe. War is coming. The government know that and so does Ireel and Deela. So the two of them have made a rare appearance to prove to you all that they’re real. Deela puts on a little bit of a scare-show and Ireel swoops in to stop her. Xanji-For rejoices and all is well again. No doubters and no outsiders.’

‘That’s…crazy,’ I said.

‘It’s sick,’ said the Doctor, stern-faced. ‘And we must stop it.’

‘How?’

‘Somewhere on this computer is going to be the schematics and instructions of how to activate the staircase that leads up to the afterlife.’

‘But it’s not real!’ I said.

‘But I’ll made you 10,000 Shanix that if you walked up that staircase it’d transport you to the cavern. Where Ireel and Deela came from.’

‘And then when we get the staircase switched off?’

The Doctor’s eyes narrowed. ‘We put an end to this sick little lie for good.’

25 Aug 2013

The Problem with Death: Chapter 9 (Danny)

My head felt clear. The medical staff had taken me to a facility at the edge of the city and had made me feel quite at home. The surroundings of the hospital were beautiful. Tall, palm-tree-like trees and lots of lots of streams, running with what looked like twinkling, turquoise water.

The room I was in was white and full of glass-fronted control panels and the hospital bed was certainly the softest I’d ever slept on.

And the voice in my head had gone.

The doctor’s had told me that they had injected me with a sedative which would block out the thoughts of the creature inside me, but it was only temporary and that they were going to work on a solution to get it out fully.

I couldn’t help but feel like they were talking about it like a tooth about to be pulled out.

And then about an hour ago the hospital was filled with commotion. Cleaners appeared and staff all over ran about, getting the wards as tidy as possible. An old man lay in a bed next to mine. He told me he was dying and he wasn’t scared. He wasn’t scared because their God had shown herself.

And so she did. A few minutes later a woman appeared. A very, very beautiful woman. She had blue skin, dark hair and wore a white dress with a hood. She smiled at each and everyone of the patients. She was followed by fawning aides and a piggy-eyed man as well as an older, more distinguished man.

She finally reached me. ‘And who are you?’ she asked, her voice silky smooth.

‘Danny. Danny Lennon.’

‘You are not Xanji.’

A doctor quickly scuttled into few. ‘If I may?’

The older man nodded at him.

‘Danny came from off-world,’ stuttered the doctor. ‘He has been possessed by a creature from another dimension.’

The woman looked at me curiously and then smiled. ‘Not today.’

‘Thanks,’ I said. ‘Who are you?’

The piggy-eyed man, who I heard someone call Rix, looked down at me, a look of anger on his face. ‘You will not address our God like that.’

‘So you’re this Ireel then?’ I asked.

‘Indeed,’ smiled Ireel, clearly not wanting anything to do with me. She looked at the man called Uthal. ‘Do you have any more off-worlders?’

‘Yes,’ said the old man. ‘In fact, where are they, Rix?’

Rix looked flustered. ‘They’re somewhere in the city.’

‘You mean you took your eyes off them?’ asked Uthal, sounding alarmed.

‘In all the commotion I simply…forgot.’

Ireel looked at the pathetic, fawning man and tutted. ‘You know the best place for us is here. Outsiders can come in and disrupt our harmony.’ She turned to Uthal. ‘I want them off-world immediately.’

‘Yes, Ireel,’ said Uthal, bowing slightly.

‘Come, I must prepare my speech to the people. There is much work to be done.’

I watched them go and when I was sure the coast was clear I scrambled out of the bed and got back into my clothes.

‘Where are you going?’ asked the old man in the bed next to me.

‘I can’t stay here,’ I said. I just had this feeling that something wasn’t right. I needed to team up with the Doctor again and get to the bottom of it and I couldn’t do it lying in this bed. I felt helpless. And I also felt good. Better than I’d ever been since leaving Thornsby.

I took one last look around the hospital ward and legged it for the corridor.

After dodging a few doctors and nurses I finally found myself in the hospital grounds. I was just nearing the gate when a loud, droning siren began blaring out.

‘ALERT. ALERT. THERE IS AN INTRUDER IN THE HOSPITAL GROUNDS. HE MUST BE APPREHENDED.’

I crouched behind a thick bush and considered my next move. It was only a few metres to the gate, but the security guards would see me.

I made a snap decision and ran for the exit.

I was almost there when there was a flash. Standing in front of me was Ireel. She shook her head in disappointment, tutting.

‘Just let me go back to my friends,’ I said politely.

‘You are too much of a bad influence. You must be silenced.’

She held out her hand. It was glowing white. She touched my arm and there was a flash of blinding light, and…

My vision cleared. Everything was blurry and I felt myself fall to the ground. There was a cry from somewhere in the distance and I was aware of someone carrying me and placing me on a bed. Was I back in the hospital?

Eventually my vision cleared. I was in a cavern. Banks of computers adorned the walls and there were people buzzing around.

‘Where am I?’

A man with glasses and pale blue skin peered down at me. ‘Hello, Mr. Lennon. My name is Dr. Apok.’

‘Am I back in the hospital?’

‘Not exactly. You’re in Hell. Or Heaven. Who sent you? Deela or Ireel?’

I frowned. ‘Ireel. Who’s Deela?’

There came a familiar voice from the far side of the cavern.

‘Danny! Danny, are you okay?’

Caroline’s face come into view.

‘Caz,’ I smiled, pleased to see she was okay. ‘What in the bloody name of sanity is going on here?’

Caroline bit her lip. ‘It’s a bit difficult to explain, actually, but you’ve been teleported.’

‘What? Where to? This can’t be the afterlife, can it? The one Aleena told you about?’

Apok laughed and helped me to sit up. ‘Come now, my friends, let’s go and talk about this. Then maybe we can find your other two friends and you can all leave peacefully.’

Apok escorted Caroline and myself through cavern and through a door which led to a nicely furnished room with a small table and a couple of soft sofas. He indicated for us to sit down and then directed an aide to bring us drinks.

The aide returned with some kind of yellow liquid which Apok said was some kind of tea. It tasted nice anyway. He sat and watched Caroline and I drinking, his fingers in a steeple fashion.

‘Are you okay?’ asked Caroline.

‘Yeah. They gave me an injection and it’s blocked off the Apparite, but it’s only temporary.’

Already I could feel the Apparite in there, like an itch you can reach.

‘I burst into flames, blacked out, had a freaky dream and then woke up.’

‘Day in the life and all that,’ I laughed.

‘You were teleported,’ said Apok.

‘But where to? This can’t really be Hell.’

Apok sighed. ‘I am only telling you this because if I don’t you will interfere. The creature your encountered in the forest was the Devil. The Non-God - Deela.’

‘I gathered that much,’ said Caroline.

I still felt baffled.

‘And the creature you met, Mr. Lennon, was our God, Ireel.’

‘And they both transported us here? To the same place?’

‘That’s correct.’

‘It still doesn’t explain anything.’

An alarm began to sound in the distance. Apok looked concerned.

His aide ran back in and they both spoke in hushed voices.

‘What’s going on?’ I asked.

‘Nothing,’ said Apok. ‘Wait here please.’

Caroline and I watched them go and I turned to her. She must have been thinking the same thing I was because she nodded and we both got up and crossed to the door.

‘There’s something fishy going on here,’ she said.

‘Definitely. And I don’t reckon this is the afterlife.’

‘Definitely not,’ said Caroline, edging the door open a little and peering outside. ‘And if it was, there’s no reason we should be here. We’re not Xanji. Surely if we were dead we’d be in our own afterlife.’ She looked back at me. ‘That’s if it’s real of course.’

I thought about it. I had often wondered what had happened to my brother, Adrian. Had he died? Was that why he had never come home. In those days after he’d disappeared I’d sat on my bed thinking about things. Thinking about death and the afterlife. It was only having Caroline there that had kept me going for as long as I had at that time. Ultimately Adrian’s disappeared had eventually led to me leaving Thornsby. The family had more or less been torn apart by it. My gran had died not long after and my parents had only really stayed together for the sake of the search for Adrian. They spent an entire year looking for him, but he never showed up.

‘Come on,’ said Caroline, bringing me out of my memories and back to reality.

I followed Caroline out of the door and down the corridor to the control room. Apok and a number of other people were gathered around a large screen. The screen showed a large staircase climbing from the centre of the city and into the clouds.

‘So it’s true, then,’ said Apok darkly. ‘Someone’s activated the staircase.’

‘Impossible!’ said one of the scientists. ‘It’s got to be a fault.’

‘It’s not,’ said Apok, pointing towards the screen. ‘It’s him. It’s that outsider. The Doctor.’

Caroline and I looked at each other and then back to the screen.

‘Get Ireel back now,’ said Apok, ‘and send someone to get rid of him.’

21 Aug 2013

The Problem with Death: Chapter 8 (Matthew)

In all the commotion of this Ireel turning up, our guards had left our side and the Doctor and Aleena saw this as an opportunity to break away. Rix had scampered after Ireel like a loyal puppy and we had disappeared into the enchanted crowd.

Aleena and the Doctor had remained pretty quiet with each other as she led us through some narrow, side streets towards a wood-panelled two-story building beside a canal.

The entrance was set low down into the ground which was reached by a small set of stone steps.

‘I thought a records room would have been grander,’ said the Doctor.

‘Nobody uses it much,’ said Aleena. ‘They have no reason to check back on our past. Another annoying habit of my people.’

Aleena knocked on the door and a small, white-haired old man opened the creaking door.

‘Yes,’ he said, fumbling a monacle into his right eye. He clearly hadn’t been expecting visitors.

‘We need some information,’ said Aleena.

The old man laughed. ‘Information? On what?’ he said, almost as if he hadn’t ever had visitors before.

‘On Deela.’

The old man almost fell back in shock. ‘Why ever would you want to read about her?’

‘Because we have reason to believe that she’s back. Haven’t you been watching the news?’ said Aleena, becoming irritated with the old man.

‘No. I’m afraid it’s just me and my cret.

‘What’s a cret?’ I asked.

‘Like a cat,’ said Aleena, brushing aside my question. ‘We need to come in.’

‘Do you have the appropriate papers?’ asked the man, trying to get a better look at myself and the Doctor.

‘Step aside, old man,’ said Aleena, pushing past him.

‘Steady Aleena,’ said the Doctor as he followed her in.

‘What’s your name, pal?’ I asked as I slipped past the old man.

‘Henri,’ he said, scampering after us.

‘Nice to meet you, Henri,’ I said.

We went down a dimly lit corridor and through an ante-chamber. A window high up in the wall gave a little bit of light, but it was almost too dark to see anything.

We were led through a few more doors until we reached another dimly lit room, this time with shelves and shelves of books, CD’s and other items designed for recording information.

‘Go and make us a cup of tea, please, Henri,’ said the Doctor.

Henri gave a little salute and hobbled back the way we had come, muttering something about outsiders.

‘So where do we start?’ I asked.

‘None of this is organised,’ groaned Aleena. ‘It’ll take us forever.’

‘Matthew, you take that shelf over there,’ said the Doctor, pointing towards one on the right. ‘I’ll look up here. Aleena, you take the central stacks.’

‘And what are we looking for?’ I asked, starting to sift through huge, leather-bound books.

‘Anything relating to death on this planet. The afterlife.’

And so we spent the next hour or so digging through old, dusty books looking for anything relating to the Xanji-For afterlife. And after all the books and all the searching and all the stress, we found absolutely…nothing. Nothing at all.

Henri had watched on in interest, and when we had finally confronted him about why there were no books on the subject, he had looked clueless.

‘Who knows?’ he simply said, shrugging his shoulders.

‘But, surely you have something?’ said the Doctor. ‘A bible? A set of rules? Documents? A badly drawn picture?? Something!’

‘The afterlife is taught to us at a young age by the council,’ said Henri, slurping on his cold tea, ‘but there are no records of it. We have no need to consult the truth.’

‘Aleena?’ said the Doctor.

‘I’ve never seen a book or bible or anything, but the council must get their information from somewhere.’

‘Hmmm,’ said the Doctor, tapping his chin. ‘Who teaches the story of the afterlife?’

‘Teachers, religious leaders.’

‘All high-up people?’ he said.

‘Exactly. Only they have direct communication with Ireel.’ She shrugged her shoulders. ‘That’s why so many have rebelled. We wanted some kind of proof, and until tonight we had none.’

The Doctor sat down on a pile of books, head in his hands.

I crossed over to him. ‘Are you alright?’ I asked, touching his shoulder.

The Doctor seemed to shudder and then looked up at me, smiling. ‘Thank you, Matthew.’

Aleena looked on glumly.

‘Your people…How could they have gotten in this state?’

‘What do you mean?’

‘I mean that I’m now left with the stupid possibility of having to expose any possible lies about your afterlife and effectively throw your entire civilisation into chaos.’ He got up and half-groaned, half-growled, talking to himself. ‘They said I shouldn’t ever get involved in other planets affairs. Sometimes I think they were right.’

‘We’ll be fine,’ I said, understanding a little of what the Doctor was saying. I remembered the Time Lords and their insistence that the Doctor not “get involved”. I chuckled slightly to myself, but I didn’t know why.

‘Would anyone like another cup of tea?’ asked Henri from the back of the records room.

‘No,’ said Aleena, a little abruptly.

‘And you,’ said the Doctor, wheeling around and stepping up to Aleena. ‘Whatever has happened to you, snap out of it!’

‘I beg your pardon?’ she said, a little taken aback.

‘You’re a grown woman. Stop sulking. Be the Aleena I used to know.’

‘That Aleena’s gone.’

‘Why? Because I didn’t come running to you straight away? Because I stopped you from spying on me and my adventures?’

She shook her head. ‘Don’t be stupid, Doctor.’

‘Then why is it? Come on, Aleena. I’ve got enough going on without you making matters worse by sulking and acting like a petulant child.’

Aleena looked as though she was about to say something, narrowed her eyes, pursed her lips and then turned and stormed out.

‘Was that necessary?’ I asked, arms folded.

The Doctor held up a finger. ‘Don’t. Just don’t.’

‘Well what’s it for?’ I asked, refusing to back down. ‘Why snap at her like that?’

He was now folding his arms. His pose looked almost identical to my own. Like a mirror image.

‘People used to enjoy travelling with me. They used to enjoy going on big adventures, fighting Daleks and Weeping Angels and Kraals. Now they get involved with people and fall in love. They invite dangerous entities into their minds and become deceptive. They moan and whine and complain because they can’t get their own way all of the time.’

‘And? That’s life?’

‘Life is supposed to be fun!’ he thundered. ‘Travelling in the TARDIS is dangerous and scary, but it’s fun.’

‘Then maybe you need to realise that too.’

He stopped. He was silent for what seemed like an eternity.

‘What do you mean?’ was all he asked, in a low, whisper-like voice.

‘You’re reckless. You throw people into situations and fail to help them when they need it. And you’ve lost your touch. You skirt around issues and you completely fail to see when problems are staring at you directly in the face.’

‘Like what?’

‘Like Caroline.’

He looked a little confused. I hadn’t really been told a lot about Caroline, but the psychic connection between the Doctor and I had grown a little and I had somehow known about her problems.

‘How many times have you tried to get back to Thornsby now?’

‘Every time I try we miss the right year.’

‘Maybe it’s you doing it? Maybe you’re the reason the TARDIS won’t get her back to 2012 to find answers and help cure her.’

‘How can it be my fault?’

I sat down on the same pile of books he’d been sat on a few moments ago. ‘We all know the TARDIS and you are telepathically connected. Maybe the TARDIS senses what you fear. If you take Caroline back and solve her problems, you’ll be on your own again. You know she’ll leave you to go back to her old life and you can’t stand that.’

‘That’s absurd,’ he said, turning away.

‘Is it? Maybe you’re not doing it consciously, but sub-consciously, under all of that, it could be the reason.’

He was quiet. Very quiet. And then he turned to me. He looked lost, like all of his authority and flair had left him. ‘What do I do?’

I smiled sadly. ‘Take her back. Make peace with her and Danny and really mean it. Really mean to take her back to Thornsby. When we leave Xanji-For, whether I’m still a part of you or not, take the two of them back and get them sorted.’

He nodded. I knew he had understood me.

‘Now let’s go and make up with Aleena, eh?’ I said.

‘So, nobody wants a cup of tea then?’ I heard Henri ask as the Doctor and I exited the room.

I turned to look at Henri. All I could feel was hatred towards this little man. Hatred towards him and hatred towards the Doctor. What was happening to me? Why was I feeling like this inside?

18 Aug 2013

The Problem with Death: Chapter 7 (Caroline)

Okay. Where am I? First thoughts? A dark, dark place. That doesn’t really help much.




I reached out a hand. Nothing, but…nothing. No warmth, no cold. No smells. Nothing. By this point was starting to panic.

‘Hello?’ I shouted into the darkness. Except there was no sound. ‘Hello!’ I shouted again. I couldn’t even hear myself.

‘HELLLLLOOOOOO!!!!’ I screamed. Finally I could hear my voice.

My heart was pounding faster and faster.

‘Is there anybody there?’ My voice was still faint, but getting louder and louder now.

I suddenly got the impression that there was something right behind me and I whirled around on my heels. It was a curious, white door. An ordinary door with a brass door knob.

I reached out my hand and touched the knob. It was cool and tingled with power.

‘Open it…’ I heard a voice say in the darkness.

Without thinking I turned the knob and the door swung open.

I was now standing in the living room of my flat back in Thornsby. I frowned as I stepped into the room. There was another noise behind me and I turned again. The door I had just come through had gone.

Everything seemed normal. The TV was on showing the local news station, the curtains were drawn and I could see the glow of the orange street light outside the window. A pile of magazines were stacked up on the glass coffee table in front of the sofa and a steaming hot cup of tea was on the side table.

I was so exhausted and went over to the sofa, falling onto the soft cushions and grabbing the tea and closing my eyes.

‘Feeling at home?’ came a voice.

I opened my eyes and sat there on the sofa were my parents.

‘What are you doing here?’ I asked. I hadn’t seen them for a long, long time.

My Dad tutted as he slurped on his tea.

My Mum looked sad and looked at me with sympathetic eyes.

‘Would you like to play a game?’ asked my Dad.

‘What kind of game?’ I asked, frowning, and not really comprehending why this was all so bizarre.

‘We call it “What Do You Know”,’ smiled my Mum.

‘What do I have to do? Do we need dice?’

My Dad laughed as he drained the last of his tea. ‘Stupid girl!’

‘Tony!’ scolded my Mother, clearly annoyed at my Dad.

I thought for a moment. This was what my Dad was always like. Even when I was at school. He never used to encourage me. It was almost like he couldn’t be bothered to waste time thinking about me.

‘How do we play the game?’ I asked.

My Mum smiled. ‘There is a lot that you don’t know about yourself. But there is also a lot that you do know about yourself.’

‘The game,’ continued my Dad, ‘is to piece together what you do know and try to come up with some answers.’

‘But you know more about me than I do,’ I said, getting frustrated at the cryptic-ness of it all.

‘But we’re just figments of your imagination,’ said Dad. ‘We only know what you know.’

‘Okay,’ I said, ‘so you are kind of like the deep-thinking inner workings of my mind, yeah?’

They both smiled. I knew I had hit the jack point.

‘So where do we start?’ I asked.

‘Here.’

My Dad clicked his fingers and suddenly I was standing on a beach. I was five years old, in a little swimming costume and holding a bucket and spade. My parents were a few metres away talking to a serious looking woman in a suit. This was the second time this had come back to me. The first time I had remembered this particular memory was when we were on the Dream Path back on Theen. Such a long time ago now.

‘I don’t understand,’ I said, shocked at the young voice that came out of me.

‘What do you know?’ came my Dad’s disembodied voice from somewhere up above.

I listened intently to the conversation. The officious looking woman was asking why my parents hadn’t allowed the regular health checks to be performed on me as a baby. My Mum was telling her that she didn’t believe in them.

‘Seems perfectly plausible to me,’ my young voice said to the disembodied voice.

‘But why don’t I believe in them?’ asked my Mum’s disembodied voice.

I thought for a moment. My parents were incredibly protective over me. Although my Dad didn’t seem to give two hoots about me, even he was protective over me. They were overbearing at times.

‘I have special powers,’ was all I could say.

‘Exactly,’ said Dad. ‘But is that the only reason?’

I thought about this. I obviously had special powers that hadn’t manifested themselves at such a young age, and my parents clearly knew about them. That’s why they were so protective of me. But I didn’t quite know what my Dad was getting at.

‘Think,’ said Dad. ‘You know that it’s not the only reason.’

‘I have no idea,’ I said, feeling a little angry at his ghostly voice. ‘Give me a clue.’

‘We can’t give you any clues,’ said Mum.

The air shimmered and I was sitting in an old fashioned room. I was around ten years old and I instantly recognised this place. The flowery wallpaper, the white cotton doily’s dotted around and the familiar smell of pot pourri. This was my grandma’s house. She was talking to my parents and I was busy playing on my Sega Gamegear.

‘Caroline, love,’ came my Grandma’s kindly voice (God, I missed that voice).

‘Caroline,’ said my Dad, ‘your Gran’s speaking to you.’

I looked up from the Gamegear and smiled. She was hobbling over to me, something in her hand. She held it out to me. It was a silver cross attached to a necklace. It glinted as she held it up to my face.

‘What is it, Grandma?’ I asked.

‘It was mine. I want you to have it.’

‘Why?’

Her voice lowered to a whisper. ‘It’ll protect you.’

‘What from?’ I asked, my voice also lowering to a hush.

‘Evil.’

‘Mum,’ came my own Mum’s voice. ‘I don’t think Caroline needs that.’

‘It’s okay Mum,’ I said.

‘No,’ said my Mum, getting up from beside Dad and crossing over to my Grandma. ‘I don’t think she needs it.’

‘She does,’ said my Grandma, looking Mum hard in the face.

‘She doesn’t need religious rubbish,’ snapped Mum. ‘We’ve talked about this before, Mum. She has us to protect her.’

‘Protect me from what?’ I asked.

‘That’s enough,’ came my Dad’s voice, as he picked up the local paper. ‘We’ll have no more of it.’

My Grandma shot Dad an angry look and then patted me on the head. ‘You’ll be alright love. Just be careful.’

Everything froze and the voices of Mum and Dad came again from somewhere near the ceiling.

‘What are we protecting you from?’ said Mum.

‘What is your Grandma afraid of?’ said Dad.

‘The ghosts. The Apparites,’ I said. ‘Did you know about them?’

They both laughed.

‘No. You didn’t know about them,’ I said. ‘But you were scared of something. You always knew that there was something out there that may try and get me. You just didn’t know what it was.’

The air shimmered again and I was lying on my bed. I only half remembered this. I had been ill with the flu or something. The whole memory of that time was a blur. It was almost as though I had forgotten. But I’m sure I wasn’t that ill.

I had heard voices downstairs. My Mum’s and two others. One male, one female. The male had been talking more than the female.

I had fallen asleep listening to the radio on my walkman and the batteries had run out. I had gotten out of bed, put in some new batteries, flicked the station on and headed downstairs to see who the people were. “It’s Like That” by Run DMC had just started on Town FM as I walked into the living room.

Then there was a searing pain in my forehead and…nothing.

The image of the living room had frozen. My Mum was standing there looking shocked. The other two figures were in shadow. I couldn’t make out their faces or anything about them, no matter how hard I tried.

‘Who are they?’ I asked.

The disembodied voices appeared. ‘Who do you think?’ said Mum.

‘I don’t know. I don’t remember this.’

‘What’s the next thing you remember?’

I thought hard. ‘I woke up in bed with a bad headache. I think. I was ill. It was bloody years ago now.’

‘And you think that is what is making you forget this?’

‘They’re just two friends of my Mum,’ I reasoned. They had always had friends coming around.

‘Then why can’t you see them?’

I half sighed, half-growled. ‘The Human brain can only remember so much. I remember my Mum’s face, obviously, but these are just two random people. That’s why I can’t remember them.’

My Dad laughed from somewhere up above. ‘Maybe you’ll see that face again one day.’

The air shimmered again.

I was getting fed up of this. I still didn’t quite know what was going on. I’m sure I had burst into flames, but I couldn’t even begin to deal with that now. I had to fathom my way through this first.

Now I was standing sitting in my living room, drinking a glass of water. Sat next to me was a dark-skinned man. Steve! It was Steve! This was only a few months before I met the Doctor. He looked concerned and was rubbing my back.

And then I remembered.

I looked down and noticed the incredibly small bulge in my tummy.

‘This was when I was pregnant,’ I said sadly.

There was a flash and it was dark. I was lying in bed and I was only half awake. I could feel Steve next to me. He was snoring loudly and I could see the blue-tinted night sky beyond the curtains. And I was sure there was a shadow standing there. Something tall…with a cloak.

I felt the panic rise up inside me. I was certain this had only been a dream. A dream I had forgotten.

The figure was shuffling closer and closer. It looked as though it was raising an arm towards me. I was panicking; hyperventilating even. And Steve had stopped snoring. The thing was almost on top of me. The air had gone cold. The thing’s hand was on my stomach. I felt it reaching inside me. Pushing it’s very fingers through my stomach, it’s ice-cold finger tips inside my body.

“Poor little Caroline!” it hissed.

I screamed in agony.

There was a flash and I was sitting in the living room again, my parents sat on the sofa.

‘I lost the baby,’ I said sadly.

‘The baby was never there,’ said Dad, no hint of emotion on his thin face.

‘It was. It was there. I was pregnant.’

‘You may have been pregnant, love,’ said Mum, ‘but that thing came for the baby. It took it away and made sure it had never even been there.’

I screwed my eyes tight and started to cry. The Apparites had come for my baby in the dead of night and taken it away. I don’t know why and I don’t know what they had done with it, but it was my baby.

And then I heard a beeping sound. A steady, rhythmic beeping like a hospital heart monitor. It was echoing in the distance but becoming clearer and clearer.

My parents were fading.

‘Don’t stop looking for the answers,’ said Mum. ‘There’s a hidden memory in there and there’s something that you’re not being told.’

My Dad looked me in the eyes. ‘Don’t trust anyone, Caroline. Don’t trust anyone at all.’




I opened my eyes. I was lying on some kind of hi-tech hospital bed. I looked all around, panicking and trying to sit up. Hands were holding me down.

‘Calm down, calm down,’ came a male voice. ‘You’re okay. Just calm down.’

I was in some sort of cavern with medical equipment and banks of computers set into the walls.

‘Where am I?’ I asked.

‘You were unconscious for some time,’ came the man’s voice.

‘Who are you?’

A pale, old-looking face with glasses and blue skin looked down at me. He smiled. ‘I’m Dr. Apok.’

‘Nice to meet you,’ I said. ‘Now what happened? I burst into flames.’

‘Yes,’ said Dr. Apok. ‘Sorry about all that.’

‘Where am I?’ I asked again.

‘Welcome to Hell, Miss Parker.’

14 Aug 2013

The Problem with Death: Chapter 6 (Aleena)

I sighed as the two armed guards escorted myself, the Doctor and Matthew through the glass street and to the park. All around beams of light were shining from spotlights on the ground and the air was full of fireworks and confetti. There were cheers and whoops of joy and the whole thing just felt as false as it had always been to me.

We were taken to the edge of the main crowd which had gathered along a long, stone pathway. This was the pathway to the Afterlife. Every year a holographic image of the staircase to the Afterlife would appear and the people of Xanji-For would give thanks to Ireel.

Everything went quiet as a podium appeared out of the ground and President Uthal stood up to it.

There were cheers from all around and an over-enthusiastic Rix appeared at our side, clapping with glee on his face.

‘Why are we here?’ asked Matthew.

The Doctor looked at him. ‘We’ll get our problem looked at once this is all over.’

Matthew sighed. ‘If I’m going to die I’d rather just get it over with.’

After a few seconds Uthal urged the crowd to quieten down, which they did. Eventually.

When he was sure it was quiet enough, Uthal cleared his throat and stepped up to the microphone.

‘People of City Nazar,’ came his old voice, booming all around, ‘Ireel has promised to show herself tonight.”

I inwardly groaned. I’d heard this so many times before. President Uthal had always promised that Ireel would show herself, but it never came about. Excuses were always made and the people just accepted those excuses.

Well, some of them did.

‘This isn’t really going to happen, you know,’ I said to the Doctor and Matthew.

Rix shot me an evil glare. ‘Of course it will!’

‘He says the same every year.’

‘This year will be different,’ said Rix, the corner of his mouth curling into an awkward smile.

‘How will it be different?’

‘Ladies and Gentlemen,’ came Uthal’s voice again, ‘I must ask for silence.’

Slowly but surely the crowd died down until only the faintest whispers could be heard.

And then, with a deafening boom and a brilliant flash of blue light, a huge, stone, staircase appeared on the pathway behind Uthal.

The crowd cheered. I gazed up at the spectacle. Although I knew it was just a hologram, it still never failed to amaze me. It stretched up as high as the eye could see, into the dark, slightly overcast sky.

‘Very impressive,’ said the Doctor, nodding his appreciation. ‘The power needed to produce a hologram like that must be phenomenal. It’s clearly got the crowd going.’

By now the crowd were beginning to chant “Ireel, Ireel, Ireel,” over and over again.

The president urged for the crowd to die down again. ‘Now, my people, pray. Pray for Ireel to show herself.’

I shook my head as everyone, except myself, Matthew and the Doctor, clambered to their knees and put their foreheads on the ground.

Uthal stared across at us, clearly willing to excuse the Doctor and Matthew, but not entirely happy with myself. He then turned to face the staircase, held his arms aloft and shouted into the heavens.

‘Come Ireel! Your subjects await you. Show yourself. We all wish to look upon your splendour!’

There came a crack of thunder and a flash of lightning from somewhere near the top of the staircase. I didn’t recall that ever happening before.

Even Rix looked up, a little concerned.

Uthal looked a little shaken, but continued. ‘Show yourself, Ireel!’

There was another rumble of thunder and more strikes of lightning. More and more people were beginning to look up from their positions on the ground, trying to see if they could spot anything.

Then, with a huge, blue flash, the clouds parted revealing a bright light beyond.

This certainly hadn’t happened before.

Everyone looked up at the staircase as a figure appeared at the top. It was so tiny, but as it slowly clambered - no, wait. It wasn’t clambering down the huge steps, it was floating down the steps. It got closer and closer and the nearer it got the sooner I realised that it was a woman. The same skin tone as myself with long, dark hair and bright yellow eyes. She wore a white dress with a light hood over the top of her head. Around her neck she wore a golden necklace studded with bright, green emeralds.

She smiled down at Uthal as the old man nervously backed away from the figure.

You could have heard a pin drop as the woman eventually floated down the last step and touch the ground before Uthal’s pedestal.

‘My…’ Uthal couldn’t finish his words.

The woman looked down at the old man and smiled. She reached out a long, slender hand and touched him on his shoulder.

‘Yes, my dear. I am Ireel.’

Rix was on his feet. He was trembling and his eyes had turned white. He was clearly pleased and at the same time surprised at what was happening.

The Doctor meanwhile was looking on intently. ‘This is fascinating. Everybody believes it.’

‘Doctor,’ I said, edging a little closer to him, ‘this has never happened before.’

‘Really?’

‘Yes,’ I said. ‘Usually the staircase appears, there’s a lightshow and fireworks and then the President informs everyone that Ireel has decided not to attend. It happens all over the planet. In every city.’

By now news Hovercopters were whirling overhead. Clearly news had gotten out that City Nazar was having a slightly different experience to everyone else this year.

The president was still quite nervous, but we could still hear his voice through the microphone.

‘Can it be true? Are you really our God?’

Ireel smiled. ‘What does your heart tell you?’

Uthal dropped to his knees and prayed before Ireel.

She smiled and then stepped before the microphone. ‘My children,’ she said, her voice silky and smooth and full of compassion, ‘I have finally returned to you.’

I looked across to Rix who was beginning to regain some composure. He looked to be smiling, as if he knew this was going to happen.

Ireel continued. ‘For the last few years I have watched Xanji-For fall. Fall from my arms. All over the planet I see people losing faith. I see people no longer believing in me. This makes me sad. I foresee a time when Xanji-For descends into war because of this, and so I have chosen this moment to return. To repair the damage that has been done. To bring back the lost sheep to the fold.’

I gulped. This couldn’t be happening. Everything I believed in told me not to believe in her, but how could I not? She’d floated down the Great Staircase from out of the clouds. She was real. She was here.

‘But that is not the only reason I have returned,’ she said to the silent onlookers. ‘Another has tried to use this opportunity to begin the war.’

Everyone was silent.

‘Deela has also returned!’

There were murmurs of panic around the crowd.

‘Who’s Deela?’ asked Matthew, clearly starting to lose track.

‘The Non-God from the Underworld.’

Matthew still looked confused.

‘Like on Earth,’ said the Doctor quickly. ‘Satan rising up from Hell.’

‘Jesus!’ said Matthew, turning his attention back to Ireel.

Uthal had regained some of his composure and was back on his feet. ‘We must get Ireel into safety,’ he said.

Uthal clicked his fingers and straight away guards were at Ireel’s side. She stepped past the podium and, flanked by the two rows of guards, was escorted down the path and past the people who gazed on in wonder. Finally she reached the back of the crowd and to myself, the Doctor, Matthew and Rix.

Rix bowed to her and she held out her hand. He kissed her hand and looked up at her.

‘Thank you.’

I thought that seemed like an odd thing to say as I watched Ireel escorted into the great, Silver Tower that dominated the city centre.

I looked at Rix cautiously as he scampered after the procession.

‘This Deela,’ said the Doctor, rubbing his chin. ‘Where can I find out more information?’

‘The records room,’ I said.

There was a loud rumble of thunder and the staircase vanished.

‘Can you take me to it?’

11 Aug 2013

The Problem with Death: Chapter 5 (Jettel)

The Doctor and his friends had been gone for a few hours now and it was getting dark. The young woman, Caroline, was sat beside the roaring fire that we had lit for her and was wrapped in a blanket, shivering in the cold night air.

I felt a little sorry for her and crossed over to her.

‘How are you feeling?’ I asked.

Caroline looked at me and smiled. ‘I’m okay. Just a little cold.’

‘The night’s on Xanji-For are cold, unfortunately. Warm days and freezing cold nights.’

‘What’s that?’ she asked, nodding towards the distance.

I looked. Beyond the trees was what looked like a white-blue glow illuminating the night sky. It was coming from City Nazar and I knew exactly what it was.

‘It’s the Festival Of Life,’ I said, shuffling a little closer towards her. ‘Once a year we - or rather, the people who believe in Ireel - celebrate our God. They throw parties and have carnivals. It’s nice, if you like that sort of thing.’

‘It sounds like you miss it,’ said Caroline, noticing the nostalgic tone to my voice.

I smiled, remembering the last festival I attended almost six years ago. ‘I used to like going as a child. Before I realised what it was all about.’

Caroline shook her head. ‘Why are you so against people believing?’

‘I’m not against people believing. What I’m against is the council making people believe. Why not allow people to follow their own beliefs?’

‘So what do you believe in?’ she asked.

‘I believe in the here and now. I believe in celebrating the life you have, not giving it all up on something that may or may not be real.’

‘But your council claim that Ireel is real, yeah?’

I nodded. ‘They claim to have contact with her, yes.’ I shook my head. ‘But there’s no proof. Every year we would hope that they’d bring her down from the Afterlife and show us that she was real. Every year they promised for it to happen and every year Ireel failed to make an appearance.’

‘And what were the excuses?’

‘That it wasn’t our time.’

Caroline laughed. ‘It really does sound they’re conning people.’

‘Maybe they are. Maybe they aren’t,’ I said, ‘but I’m not willing to dither about, wasting my life waiting for something that may or may not happen.’

There was an explosion from somewhere behind us and Caroline jumped. I could hear cries of some of my people in the distance. I helped Caroline to her feet and pulled her over to a bush.

‘Hide in here,’ I said.

‘But-’

‘Just hide in here,’ I said, a little more sternly.

I grabbed my bow and ran into the trees, searching for the source of the explosion.

‘Jettel!’ came the terrified voice of my friend, Pitt.

‘Pitt, what’s wrong? What is it?’

‘You’re not gonna believe this,’ said Pitt.

‘Just tell me, idiot,’ I said, looking at the fear in his eyes.

‘The ground opened up, just over there,’ he said, pointing down a steep hill towards a ravine.

‘And?’

‘These…things just crawled out of the hole.’

‘What kind of things.’

‘What’s going on?’ said Caroline, as she came rushing up.

I was angry. ‘I told you to hide!’

‘No time for that, mate,’ she said, trying to look towards were Pitt was pointing.

There were more cries and then the sound of a thousand, wailing creatures from down the dark ravine.

‘What is that?’ I said, never having heard a sound quite like it.

Three dark shapes shot up out of the ravine and flew over our heads. They were too quick to identify and myself, Caroline and Pitt began running back towards the campsite to investigate.

‘What on Xanji-For…?’ I said as I saw the creatures slowly floating down to surround the fire we had been sat around just moments before.

‘It can’t be…’ said Pitt.

‘What?’

‘Look at them, Jettel. What do they remind you of?’

I ducked down behind a tree as I moved in a little closer to get a better look. The three creatures were big and fat. They looked like some kind of Earthen cow made out of clay, except their faces were like snarling, Humanoid faces. From either side of their heads were horns. From the horns dripped black blood.

The creatures rose on their hind legs and snarled at the fire.

‘They can’t be!’ I said, realising why Pitt had been so concerned.

‘What are they?’ asked Caroline, scuttling over to me.

‘They’re Denta Dogs.’

‘Dental what?’

Denta Dogs. They are from the Underworld.’

‘You mean, like Hell?’ said Caroline, wide-eyed.

I nodded slowly. It seemed almost impossible. None of this was true, surely?

‘So it’s all real?’ said Caroline, trying her best not to turn and run away.

‘I don’t know,’ I said, really not knowing what I felt or believed anymore.

The three Denta’s howled in unison and slowly the fire in the centre of them began to spark and spiral upwards. The flames grew tall and began to form into the shape of a woman. A flame-filled woman. Soon the flames began to die away leaving in their place the smouldering, red form of a naked woman.

She looked just like one of us, except that she was red and had two small horns on either side of her head. She smiled, her teeth gleaming white, and her eyes were inky-black.

‘Thank you, my loves,’ said the woman, patting each of the Denta’s on their heads.

‘Who’s the red one then?’ asked Caroline.

I sighed, trying to stop myself from shaking.

‘That, Caroline, is the Non-God, or, what your people may call…the Devil.’

The Non-God began chuckling to herself and sat down on the log that Caroline and I had been sat on only a few minutes before.

‘Come out, my children,’ she smiled.

‘Does she me you?’ said Caroline.

‘Probably,’ I said.

‘Come out and play, children,’ she said in a sing-song voice.

‘I’ll go,’ said Caroline.

‘Don’t be so stupid!’ hissed Pitt, grabbing her arm.

‘She’s not from my religion,’ said Caroline with a shrug of the shoulders. ‘I’ll go speak to her. I’ll be the messenger.’

As I watched Caroline step into the clearing I was amazed at her bravery. Whilst myself and the others cowered behind pathetic bushes, here she was, heading out and doing our job for us.

‘Ah, an alien child,’ said the Non-God, as Caroline stepped into the clearing.

‘Hi,’ she said, extending her hand. ‘Caroline Fieldgate. I’m not from Xanji-For.’

‘No,’ said the Non-God.

‘What’s your name? Surely you’ve got a better one than Non-God or the Devil?’

The Non-God smiled. ‘What a polite thing you are,’ she said. She took Caroline’s hand and kissed it. ‘You may call me Deela.’

Caroline smiled. ‘Nice to meet you. Now, what the bloody hell is going on here?’

Deela smiled again, refusing to let go of Caroline’s arm. ‘Wouldn’t you like to know?’

And before any of us could do anything a blast of flames erupted from Deela’s arm, engulfing the screaming Caroline. Then, with a click of her figures, the flames disappeared and Caroline was gone, leaving nothing but a pile of smouldering ash.

7 Aug 2013

The Problem with Death: Chapter 4 (Danny)

What are we doing?

What do you mean, what are we doing?

Where are we going?

Surely you know that better than I do.

I’m laughing at you right now, mate. You know that, don’t you?

He wants to get help. He wants to help you to extract me. He’s not going to succeed.

Don’t you want to come out? That’s what you said before?

Ha ha. You stupid boy. It’s getting cosy in here.

So you’re planning on staying then?

Why not? Pretty soon we’ll be linked. They’ll never be able to separate us.

This is my body.

Our body, Danny Boy.

Okay, but I was here first.

What’s happening to the Time Lord?

He’s waking up. I think Cole fixed him.

He’s not fixed. Just a lifeline really.

For a moment I was able to recompose myself, just as the Doctor and Matthew got to their feet. The Doctor looked visibly much better and was busy brushing himself down, the wet mud having covered most of the lower half of his trousers.

‘Are you okay?’ I asked, the voice in my head slowly fading back into the background.

‘I feel as well as I can do,’ said the Doctor, a little smile on his face. ‘How about you?’

I nodded. ‘It was there. For a few minutes it was talking to me.’

‘And?’ asked Aleena, who was helping Matthew stay steady on his feet.

‘It’s not now. But he’s always in there. He’s always calling to me. He wants to stay as well.’

‘I thought you said he was trying to get out,’ said the Doctor, pulling out a hankie and wiping his hands on it.

‘Clearly he changed his mind.’

‘So what exactly happened to you two?’ asked Aleena.

‘So you’re bothered now?’ asked the Doctor, eyebrows arched.

‘Moderately bothered.’

‘Matthew was able to restart my hearts. Him and I are still linked. The trick is to meld our bodies together and kick start the regenerative process.’

‘And how do you feel about this, Matthew?’ asked Aleena.

‘I can think of worse people to become, I suppose,’ said Matthew, shrugging his shoulders.




We continued on our way for a little longer until we came up to a huge, brick wall. Every 100 metres or so there were what looked like towers. Modern, metal towers with glass windows at the top and peaked roofs. They definitely looked like guard towers.

The Doctor confidently strode up to the large, iron gates in front of us.

‘Helloooo!’ he called.

There was no reply.

‘Perhaps you ought to press the doorbell,’ suggested Matthew, nodding towards a large, green button set into a panel beside the door.

‘Yes, thank you for your input,’ said the Doctor.

He looked at myself, Aleena and Matthew and then reached for the button. He pressed it and there was a huge blast of a klaxon.

‘State your business’ came an echoing voice from a set of speakers set into the wall above the door.

‘We’re visitors. Travellers.’

There was a moment of silence. ‘She is an outsider,’ said the voice.

‘She’s just a friend trying to help us,’ said the Doctor, not having to double check who the voice was referring to.

‘She is not welcome.’

‘As I said, she’s helping us not you.’

There was silence.

‘Look,’ continued the Doctor, ‘I don’t want to offend you, but we really do need help. My friend, Danny, has become, well, possessed by a creature. Aleena believes your scientists may be able to help him.’

More silence.

‘Look, are you going to at least let us in the city?’

‘Please wait,’ came the voice.

They waited. And they waited. For what was probably minutes but seemed like hours.

Finally there came a sound from the gates and they slowly swung open revealing a tall, thin man standing there, flanked by two guards. He lifted his purple robes up so they didn’t trail on the wet mud beyond the gleaming city pathways and walked towards the Doctor.

I noticed Aleena sneering at the man.

‘I am Rix. I’m responsible for Outer World Communication.’

The Doctor extended his hand.

Rix didn’t it.

‘Please to meet you,’ said the Doctor. ‘I know you don’t like outsiders, but we’re in desperate need of your expertise.’

‘So the guard was telling me,’ said Rix, stepping towards me.

I felt a little uncomfortable as his small, black eyes looked me up and down.

Look at him. Staring at us.

I shook the voice away again. ‘I’m Danny,’ I said, extending my hand.

Rix smiled, frowned and looked down at my hand. ‘Not until you’ve been cleansed,’ he said with disgust in his voice.

‘Hey!’ I said, a little peed off at the bloke. ‘There’s nothing wrong with me.’

Apart from me being inside here.

‘Shut up!’ I said aloud.

‘I beg your pardon?’ said Rix, looking a little insulted.

‘Ah,’ said the Doctor, ‘my friend has been through a lot. If we could just get him inside…’

‘Not so fast,’ said Rix, holding a hand up to the Doctor. ‘Why exactly should we help you?’

‘Out of the sheer goodness of your heart, perhaps?’ offered the Doctor.

Aleena stifled a laugh.

Rix’s eyes flicked to her and then back to the Doctor. ‘We are a private people. We don’t do anything out of the goodness of our heart.’

The Doctor thought for a moment. ‘I can help you.’

‘How?’

‘Reunite your people and the outsiders.’

Aleena frowned.

‘They don’t believe in Ireel. How can you make them believe?’

‘I can’t make them believe, but I can find a way for you to live in peace.’

‘Ah, forget it,’ said Aleena, sitting down on a tree stump and drawing her knees in. ‘They don’t even want us here.’

‘That is true,’ said Rix, looking her up and down with disgust.

As I watched the argument begin to flare up I felt the Apparite inside my head again. My vision was going blurry and I could feel my legs starting to give way. Matthew must have noticed me because he was by my side in an instant as I felt myself fall to the floor.

‘Can we just get inside?’ I heard the Doctor say as he and Matthew hauled me to my feet.

‘Very well,’ said Rix. ‘And then we can discuss terms.’




I wasn’t sure how much time had passed, but a little while later I woke up. I was on a soft mattress surrounded by medical equipment and a number of blue skinned male and female nurses. The air smelt sweet and fresh and everywhere looked bright.

‘How are you feeling, Danny?’ asked the Doctor, who had appeared at my bedside.

‘Funny,’ I said, not feeling quite “with it”.

Tell him how I’m sitting in your head singing you lullaby’s.

‘He’s talking to me now,’ I said.

‘I know. I know,’ said the Doctor. ‘The doctor’s are going to examine you and see if there’s anything we can do.’

‘Do you think they can?’

They can’t.

‘I’m not sure, but even if they can just help to suppress it until we can find a real solution…well, I know it’s not ideal, but at least you’ll be back on your feet.’

I nodded. I couldn’t go on feeling like this. I had no idea why the Doctor thought the Xanji-For could help me. They didn’t seem any more technically advanced than any other race we’d met, but I had to put my faith in the Doctor. I didn’t have any other choice.

‘I’ll speak with you later, Danny,’ said the Doctor.

‘Where are you going?’ I asked, realising that I didn’t want to be left alone.

‘To the Festival Of Life. I’ll explain later.’

He gave me a little wave and then he was gone.

He’s more interested in himself than you.

Somehow I trusted the voice. I knew I shouldn’t, but I couldn’t help myself.

4 Aug 2013

The Problem with Death: Chapter 3 (Matthew)

I was dreaming.

I was standing in front of a big wheel. One of those at fairgrounds. What other wheels are there? And across the way was a woman in Victorian clothing. Long, curly, red hair and a smile that would melt the coldest of hearts.

It was Ivy. Ivy Coldstone.

And I was the Doctor. But then I wasn’t. Then I was changing. The memories were there, but they felt as though they no longer belonged to me. And the world around me was fading into whiteness and cold. I could hear aeroplanes overhead. They felt like somebody else’s memories. Like they shouldn’t be there at all.

And then…

I opened my eyes. A covering was being opened from above me and there was a familiar face. A bald man. This was the Doctor. And then I began to remember. I was just the backup. The false Doctor. The possible future. The expendable one. The being that had become a real man and then had been locked away to keep him safe.

‘Up you get,’ said the bald Doctor, grabbing my hand and hefting me up out of my live-in-coffin.

‘Wait,’ I said, struggling to get the initial word out.

‘We don’t have time,’ he said, hauling me out and onto my feet where I wobbled for a number of times before falling back against the wall.

‘I just need a moment.’

I honestly felt like he couldn’t care less about me, like I was just a pawn to make sure he continued in his life. Instead of letting me live my life as Matthew Cole, I had to become part of him again. I felt angry. A rage - a hatred - burned inside me.

‘Come on,’ he said, tugging on my arm.

‘Leave me alone!’ I snapped, feeling my fury knock him back.

He stepped back, frowned and looked at me. ‘What’s wrong with you?’

‘Do you really have to ask that?’ I asked.

‘We’re getting us help. After they’ve helped Danny, I’ll ask Aleena’s people to try and put us back together.’

‘And that doesn’t bother you?’

‘Not dying? No, it doesn’t bother me. I bothers me that I’ll probably regenerate and it bothers me that I’m having to resort to doing this, but it has to be done.’

‘Does it?’

‘Yes.’ He stepped forward again and looked at me. ‘Look, what’s wrong?’

‘It doesn’t bother you that you’ll be killing me?’

‘But you won’t die. You’ll become a part of me.’

‘But everything I am - everything Matthew Cole is - will be dead.’

‘But you haven’t even experienced life. Not really. And all that you have experienced will live on inside me.’

‘So you wouldn’t mind a baby dying after a few weeks.’

‘What?’

‘If a baby died after a few weeks, would you say that it didn’t matter? Would you say that they hadn’t experienced enough to matter? What about the potential? What about the life that they have yet to lead?’

The Doctor looked hurt.

I shook my head at him and walked past. ‘Come on.’

But something inside me felt different. Something didn’t feel right at all.




I had reluctantly listened to the Doctor’s situation as we made our way out of the TARDIS and into the muddy forest beyond it’s dimensions.

I smiled as I felt the rain trickle down through my hair and onto my face. It had been such a long time - or at least felt like a long time - since I had felt anything close to nature. I had dreamt all sorts of things, but none of the dreams felt real. Not like this did now.

‘So, you’re Matthew Cole are you?’ asked the woman who had been introduced to me as Aleena.

‘Yes,’ I said, not making eye contact with her. ‘And you’re Aleena.’

‘That’s right,’ she said as we walked through the forest, the Doctor a little way ahead, one arm around the ailing Danny.

‘You’re the woman who took the Doctor away before me and him could become one?’

She looked a little confused. ‘Yeah. Yeah, I did.’

‘Thank you,’ I said, smiling. I knew it was the wrong thing to say as it had caused the Doctor so many problems, but this woman had helped to bring life to myself.

‘Why would you thank me?’

‘Because you allowed me to live.’

‘Come on, you two. We’re almost there,’ said the Doctor from up ahead.

‘Why are you so frosty with him?’ I asked. I had noticed Aleena and the Doctor, supposedly the greatest of friends, had been rather unfriendly towards each other. They had hardly said a word since I had joined them.

‘Because he abandoned me. And even now he refuses to help us.’

‘That’s not what he told me,’ I said.

‘Oh, he’ll make a case for us, but he won’t do anything to change matters.’

‘The Doctor doesn’t interfere,’ I said, almost remembering how he - how I - could be.

Aleena laughed and shook her head. ‘Don’t. Just don’t.’

Up ahead I noticed that the Doctor was beginning to struggle with Danny. I thought I’d better make myself useful so jogged up ahead to help him. Danny was beginning to regain a little more composure, but it was the Doctor that was struggling.

‘Are you okay?’ I asked, noticing the visible look of pain in his eyes.

‘It’s my hearts,’ he said, rubbing his chest.

‘Take your pills,’ said Aleena, walking up to him. Despite her annoyance at the Doctor, she was clearly still worried about him.

‘They don’t seem to be doing me much good anymore.’

He coughed and dropped to his knees.

‘Breathe,’ said Aleena, kneeling down in front of him.

‘I can’t. I can’t.’

I felt helpless.

‘Do something,’ said the Doctor’s concerned companion, Danny.

‘What do you want me to do?’ I said.

The Doctor keeled over, rolling into a foetal position and clutching his chest.

‘Just do something!’ shouted Aleena, grabbing me and forcing me down to my knees.

I didn’t know what to do. I saw the helpless, bald Time Lord in agony on the floor, gasping in pain. He looked so pathetic. I reached out a hand towards him and touched his chest…




There was a flash and we were standing in a white void. I was face to face with the Doctor. And he was well and standing with his hands in his long coat’s pockets.

‘Where are we?’ I asked, not being able to sense anything other than him and the white light.

‘A shared vision,’ said the Doctor, looking around him. ‘It seems that we’re still connected. Remember in Manchester? You touched me and it knocked us both out.’

‘So there’s still a chance that we can put the two of us back together?’

He looked down and sighed. ‘Matthew, I’ve been thinking a lot about what you said to me in the TARDIS. I’m not going to force you into anything. The decision has to be yours and yours alone.’

‘I want to help you,’ I said, but still not being sure about it myself. ‘I really, really want to help you.’

‘You already are,’ he smiled.

There was a shadow that moved in the corner of my eye. I couldn’t quite make out his features, but he seemed familiar.

‘Who’s that?’ I asked.

‘It’s you and I. It’s the incarnation that we were before now. It’s our shared memory. The Doctor who met Ivy Coldstone. The Doctor who fought the Daleks on the Broken Crystal Shore. The Doctor who ate the Deadly Cheesecake.’

‘I think I remember,’ I said.

‘And do you know why you remember?’ said the Doctor, putting one hand on my shoulder and looking down at me.

I shook my head.

‘Because you are me. Because we are the same. Because you remember all of those things. They all happened to you. Every single one of them. All of the people you met; Clara, Ivy, Kitty, Martha, Leela, Tegan, Alfred…they’re all in there because you are the Doctor.’

I smiled. The Doctor’s words made me feel better about myself. For the first time I felt that I wouldn’t die. I felt safe. But I knew that the road to becoming the Doctor again would be a rocky one.

And for some reason, even now, it didn’t feel right. Everything he said made sense, but something was telling me over and over again that something wasn’t right.

And then the white light faded and the rain was falling on my face again. Aleena and Danny stood over me and I was smiling.